When we decided to have a child, we knew we were going through difficult times, but also a wonderful time with our child.

We had no idea how we would be difficult.

 

To start, we had to go through the PMA (medically assisted procreation) for this pregnancy happens. June 23, 2009, I the results of my blood test and I am indeed pregnant. Nine months of happiness, a healthy pregnancy, the doctor announces that it will be a little girl, we find his name Enola. It should arrive March 10, 2010.

 

And March 10, nothing, miss is shy, not contraction, a closed neck and a small chip that always moves in my canteen.

March 12, echo control and then the start of our descent into Hell: oligohydramnios, amniotic fluid is too little to let me go. You have to induce it.

 

And I let myself take care, childbirth I do not know what it is !! It must mature my collar which is closed, long and toned. OK if you must agree and I am told that we will be a tablet on my cervix to help it expand.

 

I do not react to cytotec finally not immediately then we wonder a second and then a third. And 13 to 17h first signs of weakness for my daughter, then towards the delivery room for long hours, break my water bag, it puts me in oxytocin and epidural. I feel nothing, not even the contractions coming in and are too numerous. My collar finally opens despite several signs of suffering guard gynecologist says that my daughter will come out low voice and not otherwise.

 

Within hours, forceps and an exhausted mom, these are the memories of my birth. A small blue girl does not cry and that takes away from us, Dad can not come !! Stitches for a beautiful episiotomy and finally the news.

 

It is well, tired, headache and certainly of fluid in the lungs and intestines so as to antibiosis perf. I finally have the right to see her, she is Neonatal, to take it a bit in my arms and I must return to my room.

 

Then a pediatrician comes to tell me that her lactate levels are too high, we have to transfer it to another specialized hospital for further testing him. It starts with the SAMU sheave Neonatal away from me.

 

And there you explain to me, fetal distress, lack of oxygen, brain damage...

They teach me how to become a mother to take care of my daughter, it helps me to take her in my arms, and at the same time continue the exams, they are bad, despite hypothermia, drugs and all our force, the brain is too damaged.

 

April 02, she died in our arms...